Michael, Farrah and (not) Jeff

The King of Pop is dead. Long live . . . who?

Pop music lives on, but without an obvious successor to the Pop crown. That Timberlake fella’s just a bit too normal and balanced.

Jackson will be remembered for a few good albums, but mostly for the chimpanzee, the oxygen tent, “Wacko Jacko”, the bizarre behaviour, the accusations, aspersions and gossip.

It’s hard to feel anything but pity for this man who remained a boy in so many ways. And it’s very hard to shake the sense that he’d been dying before our eyes for the last two decades.

In a perfect world Jackson’s life would be a stark warning about the dangers of growing up in the celebrity spotlight.

Unfortunately, his lasting impression will probably be a vague whiff of salacious scandal and a dodgy telemovie starring Jaden Smith as Young Michael and Marilyn Manson as the adult.

Media coverage of Jackson is beyond comprehensive right now, far overshadowing the other tragic celebrity death of the moment, Farrah Fawcett.

Farrah’s battle with cancer (detailed in not one, but two recent documentaries) has been big news for years now, but she’s hardly getting a look in.

One is reminded of Jimmy Stewart’s death in 1997 which rendered the death of legendary actor Robert Mitchum all but forgotten.

We haven’t forgotten you, Farrah.

Then, just to throw a bit of bizarrity into the day someone somewhere took the idea that “things happen in threes” as an instruction, and announced that Jeff Goldblum had plummeted to his death from a cliff while filming in New Zealand.

This got as far as being officially announced on Australia’s Today show before being revealed as a hoax and denied by a bemused and very-much-alive Jeff Goldblum.

Richard Wilkins, you’re an idiot.

What a day. It won’t quite live in infamy, but we won’t see its like again for a while. Hopefully.

Dead Pool 2009 – May Update

Welcome once again to the macabre world of Dead Pool 2009.

Mwahaha…ha…*cough*…ha…

Let’s kick off first with a late-reported death from April.

On April 30, amateur astronomer Venetia Phair passed away at the age of 90. Phair was brought to prominence in 1930 aged just 11, when she named the newly-discovered planet Pluto. Phair was remembered again recently when Pluto was demoted from a planet to a dwarf planet. Shame about that.

Still, Walt Disney pinched the name for Mickey's dog a few years later. And that’s still cool. Right?

On May 4 comedy legend Dom DeLuise died of kidney failure aged 76. Best known for his roles in just about all of Mel Brooks’ movies, I still remember him for the opening scene of The Muppet Movie, where he played the sleazy agent who convinces Kermit to go to Hollywood.

So we have Dom to thank for the Muppets. Well, why not? Let’s go with that.

On the 15th, as previously mentioned legendary Australian actor Charles ‘Bud’ Tingwell passed away at the age of 86.

On the 18th US rapper Roderick Anthony Burton II (aka “Dolla” … twice as good as 50 Cent etc etc) was shot and killed in Beverley Hills. Of course if the precedent set by 2Pac is anything to go by, this means a glowing career of successful albums, Grammy awards and unverified sightings in Hollywood nightclubs.

On the 21st we farewelled actress Joan Alexander, best known for her role as Lois Lane in the radio serial The Adventures of Superman in the 1940s. Tragically taken in her prime at the age of 94 this is clear evidence that the curse of Superman strikes again!

And finally, on the 31st the world lost Millvina Dean, the last survivor  of the Titanic disaster in 1912.

Of course, it’ll be some years before we farewell the last survivor of the Titanic disaster of 1997.

The current score for this year’s pool still stands at a draw, with Benn and Ty sharing the lead on 14 points.

Stay tuned for further updates.

Charles ‘Bud’ Tingwell

The great Australian actor Charles ‘Bud’ Tingwell has passed away at the age of 86.

One of Australia’s hardest working and most respected actors, Bud was loved by generations of Australians.

Bud brought a touch of class to everything he did, whether it was the Australian war movies of the 1940s, the Hammer horror films of the 1960s, or the ‘Charlie the Wonder Dog’ segment of the D-Generation’s The Late Show.

He will be sadly missed.

In the wake of Bud’s sad death we solemnly and respectfully award 14 points to Ty, who is now running equal first with Benn in this year’s competition.

Dead Pool 2009 – April Update

Welcome back to the 2009 dead pool.

Our first score for the year has been realised, with the tragic passing of the legendary Bea Arthur scoring Benn an estimable 14 points.

In other celebrity mortality news, the 7th saw the death of game designer Dave Arneson. Along with Gary Gygax who sadly passed away just over a year ago, Arneson was the co-creator of Dungeons and Dragons.

  On the 19th science fiction author J.G. Ballard passed away at the age of 78. Although best known for the film adaptations of his novels Crash and Empire of the Sun (neither of which can be reasonably labelled sci-fi) Ballard was hugely influential on the genre as he explored themes of ecological catastrophe, dystopian futures and the cult of celebrity.

Finally, on the 28th we farewelled Australian businessman and philanthropist Richard Pratt at the age of 74. Pratt made his fortune by illegally inflating prices in the Australian cardboard box industry as part of a cartel, but depending on who you ask he was either a criminal who should have been jailed or a great guy because he gave some of that money to charity. I’ll let my readers decided for themselves on that one.

And that wraps it up for April

Once again, congratulations to Benn who is now leading with a score of 14, and we’ll see you again next month.

Bea Arthur

The legendary comedienne and actress Bea Arthur has passed away at the age of 86.

Stealing our hearts as Maude in the 70s and acerbic Golden Girl Dorothy in the 80s, she will be sadly missed.

Let’s remember her with one of my favourites . . . a duet with Rock Hudson and a lovely ode to recreational drugs.

RIP Bea.

And Benn, 14 points for you.

Dead Pool 2009 - March Update

March turned out to be a reasonably quiet month, although there were a few celebrity deaths all the more tragic for their unexpectedness.

On the 18th actress Natasha Richardson died at the age of 45 following a skiing accident in Canada. Daughter of the legendary Vanessa Redgrave and granddaughter of Sir Michael Redgrave, Richardson was the product of great acting stock but still a respected star of stage and screen in her own right.

On the 22nd reality TV star Jade Goody died of cervical cancer at the age of 27. After becoming famous as a UK Big Brother housemate in 2002, Goody turned what could have (and arguably should have) been fleeting notoriety into a lucrative career, and had the cameras rolling right up to the moment of her death. Expect a somewhat macabre documentary to be released very soon.

Finally, the 29th saw the death of US actor Andy Hallett at the age of 33. Best known as the singing demon Lorne in the TV series Angel, Hallett suffered heart failure as a result of cardiomyopathy contracted soon after finishing his stint on Angel.

A tragic month it was, but the score for our contestants is still nil-all.

Stay tuned for next month’s update.

Dead Pool 2009 – February Update

We’re now two months into 2009 and while we’re yet to see any movement in the scoreboard, it’s been another interesting month.

On the 3rd American graphic designer Ben Blank passed away at the age of 87. You know when a newsreader has a graphic over their shoulder representing the story? Yeah. Well this guy invented that. Seriously.

And while we’re talking obscure technological references on the 4th Mark Shepherd, chairman of Texas Instruments, passed away at the age of 86. (Note that he should not be confused with Mark Sheppard, the actor who played Badger on Firefly and Romo Lampkin on Battlestar Galactica. As far as I’m aware he’s fine).

The 7th, which has since been dubbed Black Saturday, saw the worst Australian bushfires in living memory. The fires claimed the lives of over 200 people, including actor Reg Evans at 80 and and legendary newsreader Brian Naylor at 78.

Also on the 7th we farewelled scientist Jack Cover, inventor of the Taser. There’s probably a joke in there, but it would probably be in poor taste. So I won’t.

The 16th saw the death of of Dorothy Bridges, wife of the late Lloyd and mother of actors Beau and Jeff.

On the 20th we had not one, but two famous animal deaths, with Australian racehorse Fine Cotton (of the infamous Fine Cotton Scandal) shuffled off to the glue factory at 31, and former First Cat Socks Clinton sent off to greet the great Ceiling Cat at the age of 19.

The 20th also saw the death of Irish author Christopher Nolan. Again, he should not to be confused with the UK-born director of The Dark Knight, who is also probably fine. As far as I know.

And finally on the 25th we farewelled science fiction author Philip José Farmer at the age of 91. Farmer was a writer with a prolific output and a man who knew better than to let the niceties of grammar and sentence structure get in the way of telling a rip-snorting story.

 

And that wraps it up for February. Keep watching those obituary columns and stay tuned for next month’s update.

Dead Pool 2009 – January Update

We’re just one month into the new year and while we’re yet to see any score in the pool, we’ve already seen some serious mortality.

The year started on a tragic note, with the announcement on the 2nd that Jett Travolta, the son of sometime actor and noted Scientologist John, had died at the tender age of 16.

On the 6th John Scott Martin, the world’s longest-serving Dalek operator (rolling around in one of those things from 1965 to 1988) passed away at the age of 83.

Also on the 6th, Apple boss Steve Jobs declined to deliver the Macworld keynote address, throwing the rumour mill into overdrive and prompting this very tasteless (albeit very funny) cartoon on xkcd.

(And that mill continues to turn, with the announcement on the 15th that Mr. Jobs will be taking extended sick leave until June. Hmmm.)

The 13th and 14th saw an unfortunate classic actor double-bill, with the respective deaths of The Prisoner Patrick McGoohan at age 80, and Fantasy Island (and occasional Star Trek) star Ricardo Montalbán at age 88.

On the 16th we farewelled Sir John Mortimer, creator of the modern legal drama with his classic grumpy barrister Rumpole of the Bailey.

On the 25th Kim Manners, director of many, many episodes of modern classic The X-Files and modern classic wannabe Supernatural, passed away at 58.

Finally, on the 27th we farewelled American author John Updike, a man who tragically lived to see his classic novel The Witches of Eastwick go from a great book to a passable film to a dodgy stage musical.

And that wraps it up for January. Stay tuned for further updates.

Welcome to Celebrity Dead Pool 2009

As the title suggests, it’s time for Celebrity Dead Pool 2009.

Thanks to all those who have entered. It’s shaping up to be an interesting year, with 18 entries and 126 unique nominees.

Like last year, posts on the Dead Pool can be quickly accessed using the link on the right-hand sidebar. I’ve also added a link for quick reference to the rules and to last year’s competition.

And so without further ado, here are the 2009 nominations:

Amanda Clint Eastwood Queen Elizabeth II Hugh Hefner Paul Hogan Barry Humphries Lindsay Lohan Diego Maradona Katie Price O.J. Simpson Amy Winehouse	Benn Bea Arthur Mercedes Corby Derryn Hinch Joseph Jackson La Toya Jackson Michael Jackson Magic Johnson Mickey Rooney Eric Sykes Carl Williams
Cath Muhammad Ali Richard Attenborough Ernest Borgnine Fidel Castro Joan Collins Kirk Douglas Zsa Zsa Gabor Jerry Lewis Lindsay Lohan Dick Van Dyke	Debbie Muhammad Ali Tony Bennett Fidel Castro Kirk Douglas Peaches Geldof Larry Hagman Les Paul Lou Richards JD Salinger Margaret Thatcher
Eliza Muhammad Ali Fidel Castro Zsa Zsa Gabor Hazel Hawke Michael Jackson Courtney Love Liza Minelli Bert Newton Keith Richards Amy Winehouse	Emmy John Cleese Zac Efron Katie Holmes Joseph Jackson Chloe Lattanzi Joanna Lumley Natalie Portman John So Allegra Versace John Wood
Greg Christina Amphlett Julie Andrews Miley Cyrus Blanche D'Alpuget Judi Dench Hazel Hawke Elton John Solomon Lew Liza Minelli Jessica Origliasso	Jarrod Richie Benaud Gary Coleman Phyllis Diller Kirk Douglas Zsa Zsa Gabor John Goodman Charles Manson John McCain Nancy Reagan Elizabeth Taylor
Jill Akihito, Emperor of Japan Ernest Borgnine Kirk Douglas Angela Lansbury Liza Minelli Peter O'Toole Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh Nancy Reagan Britney Spears Gough Whitlam	Kate Natalie Cole Jeff Conaway Paul Gascoigne Corey Haim Robert Mugabe Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh Joaquin Phoenix Nancy Reagan Elizabeth Taylor Allegra Versace
Kylie Pamela Anderson Osama Bin Laden Fidel Castro Pete Doherty Queen Elizabeth II Hugh Hefner Curtis Jackson Nancy Reagan Keith Richards Amy Winehouse	Paul Antonio Banderas Johnny Depp Harrison Ford Rachel Griffiths Katie Holmes John Howard Bill Hunter Dannii Minogue Geoffrey Rush Elizabeth Taylor
Rob George H. W. Bush Doris Day Clint Eastwood Queen Elizabeth II Michael Jackson John Laws Barack Obama Mary-Kate Olsen Keith Richards Elizabeth Taylor	Russell Pamela Anderson Fidel Castro Doris Day Farrah Fawcett Rudolph Giuliani Michael Jackson Margaret Thatcher Steven Tyler Gough Whitlam Margaret Whitlam
Sarah Bryce Courtenay Lindsay Fox Bob Hawke Nathan Hudson Di Morrissey Mary-Kate Olsen Michael Parkinson Margaret Thatcher Gene Wilder Terry Wogan	Shannon Zelman Cowen Blake Fielder-Civil Annette Funicello Mikhail Gorbachev Val Jellay Kim Jong-Il Bert Newton Jackie Stallone Elizabeth Taylor Gough Whitlam
Toby Lily Allen Richie Benaud George W. Bush Cher Dawn French Natalie Imbruglia Stevie Nicks Keith Richards John Symond Amy Winehouse	Ty Ronnie Biggs Fidel Castro Kirk Douglas Clive Dunn Michael Jackson Shia LaBeouf Marilyn Manson Joaquin Phoenix Elizabeth Taylor Charles 'Bud' Tingwell

2008 Celebrity Dead Pool Wrap-Up

Well, that’s it for 2008.

It only remains to see what happened in December, announce the 2008 winners and then roll on in to 2009.

So first things first.

On December 4th Forrest J. Ackerman, magazine editor, writer, collector and science fiction super-nerd passed away at the age of 92. A friend of the sci-fi fan community since long before it was cool (wait . . . is it cool yet?) he will be sadly missed.

On the 8th TV director Bob Spiers died at the age of 63. Spiers was known for his work on just about every famous British sitcom you can think of: Dad’s Army, Fawlty Towers, The Goodies, French and Saunders, Bottom and Absolutely Fabulous. He also directed Spice World, but we’ll let that one slide.

On the 11th the world lost the iconic Bettie Page at the age of 85. Page was a pioneer of fetish and BDSM modelling back when it all seemed so charmingly innocent, or at least that’s the way they make it look in the movies. It probably wasn’t. Still, it inspired her to become a Baptist missionary so . . . I’m not sure where I’m going with this. I’ll stop there.

On the 18th Majel Barrett, the wife of Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry passed away at the age of 76. Majel appeared in every incarnation of Star Trek, most notably as Lwaxana Troi in Deep Space Nine and as the voice of the onboard computer in each series.

On the 24th Nobel laureate and outspoken playwright Harold Pinter passed away at the age of 78. Known as much for his political views as for his plays, Pinter’s particular brand of scathing commentary on world politics will be deeply missed.

And finally on the 25th Eartha Kitt, comedienne, singer, actress, gay icon and everyone’s favourite catwoman passed away at the age of 81. If only Halle Berry had paid a little more attention.

And thus ends the 2008 Celebrity Dead Pool, with the final scores standing as follows:

Spoon (a.k.a Rob) 17
Kate 16

With no second prizes, Rob wins the day and the double pass to Village Cinema Gold Class.

Congratulations!

One week to go

Christmas is just around the corner, which means there’s only one week left to get your entries in for the

2009 Celebrity Dead Pool !

Entries are flooding in already, you can read all the rules here and email me with your nominations at ilikeportello@gmail.com.

Don’t delay!

Get Ready for Celebrity Dead Pool 2009!

With just three weeks remaining of 2008, we're on the downhill run for the 2008 Celebrity Dead Pool, which means . . .

It's time to start thinking about who's going to be dropping off the perch in 2009 !

We've had a some surprising celebrity deaths this year, and you can bet your last dog-eared copy of Who magazine that 2009 will be no exception.

The only question is . . . can YOU pick a winner?

Just like the 2008 Celebrity Dead Pool, the game is very simple.

Simply nominate a list of 10 celebrities you believe are not long for this world, and submit them to me before 12am on 1 January 2009.

You can email your nominations to me at ilikeportello@gmail.com.

And that's it! From then on it's just a ghoulish waiting game.

Entry is free and the prize once again will be a double pass to Village Cinema Gold Class.

And finally there are, of course, some rules.

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Scoring

1. The score awarded for a correctly predicted death will be equal to 100 minus Age at Date of Death.

2. A person's "age" will be defined as their Age Last Birthday. This figure is incremented at the instant of 12am on the date of the person's birthday. This means that if a person dies on their birthday, their age is taken as the age they had just become that day.

3. If a person is over the age of 100 at their date of death, the score will be zero.

4. In the event of dispute about a person's precise age, the issue will be investigated by the moderator (me) and a decision made based on the best available evidence. The moderator's decision is final and no correspondence will be entered in to.

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The Rules

1. All nominated persons must be human and must be alive as at 12am on 1 January 2009.

2. If you make a nomination and the person dies before 12am on 1 January 2009, you may substitute another name. You have 1 day's grace, and the substitution must happen before 12am on 2 January 2009.

3. Nominated persons must be famous or infamous in their own right, not (for example) because they're sick, or because they're very old, or because they're hideously and tragically deformed, or because they're about to undergo an extraordinary, ground-breaking and very risky operation.

4. For a death to be valid, it must be reported by at least one major mainstream media outlet. Examples include AP, AAP, Reuters, a major national or metropolitan newspaper or a major national or metropolitan TV network. Your blog doesn't count.

5. The death of a local celebrity will only be valid if their death is reported by a national media outlet, or by a major media outlet in another city.

6. If a nominated person is on death row or known to have a terminal illness at the start of the game, no points will be awarded if they die of the expected cause. Similarly, if a nominated person is being held hostage at the start of the game, no points will be awarded if they are killed by their captors or in a rescue attempt. Points will be awarded only if such a nominated person dies from another unrelated cause.

7. Each nomination list may have at most 10 names.

8. No name may appear on a nomination list more than once. You may, however, submit more than one list.

9. Any attempts to influence the result via homicidal acts will result in immediate disqualification.

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Get your nominations in before 1 January, and good luck!

Dead Pool November Update

November was a pretty slow month for celebrity deaths.

On the 4th prolific paperback producer Michael Crichton passed away at the age of 66. His legacies include the science fiction classic Westworld, the story of an amusement park where things go horribly wrong. And science fiction classic Jurassic Park, the story of an amusement park where things go . . . wait a minute.

On the 9th Jayden Federline (aka Britney Baby II) was admitted to hospital suffering a “bad reaction” to “something” he “ingested”. Uh-huh. It turned out he was fine. Sorry, Shannon.

On the 10th legendary mathematician Kiyoshi Itō died of respiratory failure at the age of 93. This guy has a whole branch of calculus named after him which enables analysis of complicated stochastic processes like Brownian motion. This is incredibly useful in financial mathematics, but most importantly it’s one of the main components of Douglas Adams' Infinite Improbability Drive.

The 12th saw the death of Mitch Mitchell, original drummer of The Jimi Hendrix Experience. As a kind of anti-tribute to Spinal Tap and their disposable drummers, he was the last to go.

Finally, on the 29th we farewelled Jørn Utzon, the Danish architect who won an award for Norway the Sydney Opera House. There is no truth to the rumour that his funeral will be delayed because of cost overruns and poor planning.

Well, that’s it for November and the scores remain as they were last month:

Spoon 17 Kate 16

There’s only one month to go for the 2008 competition, and unless something big happens it looks like it might be Spoon’s year.

But it is the silly season, so it’s not over yet.

Dead Pool October Update

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